sick and tired of always being sick and tired

...and no, I'm no longer surfing the crimson wave. I'm just plain pissed.

I'm just exhausted because of certain people. The kind of people who use me for their own benefits. Yes, I should be thankful for some of their generosities to me but sometimes I feel like I'm used to make them look good. I also don't mind doing stuff for them... but it's like when I lend a helping hand, they go ahead and take the other hand too. I don't even know if they realize it.

Drained Brain

Perhaps that's why I have had nothing interesting to write about for the past couple of blogs. My brain is squeezed with so many things to think about. I have mentioned before that stress and me don't work well together.

I've had a migraine since yesterday but thankfully it's slowly going away... after 2 Tylenol PM, 3 Tylenol capsules and 1 (I don't even know the name of the pill), it's statting to go away. But yeah... I hope it continues to go away. It bugs me coz I didn't get to work today and wasn't able to meet up with Polly and Mickee :( The one time that we can all hang out, I get this nasty, monsterous headache. But Polly said Friday noon might work so fingers crossed!!!

Since I wasn't feeling very well, I got to stay in and watch The Ellen show. I haven't caught it for awhile and always had to watch episodes on YouTube. Anyhoo, today, a Filipina girl named Charice Pempengco performed there. She got discovered on YouTube and Ellen Degeneres invited her to the show. So I managed to watch that today it and she was amazing as always. She teared up which made Ellen tear up a little bit as well. Bianca Ryan, eat your heart out! Lol. And Sam Concepcion who?

Charice might have not won Little Big Star (the singing contest that didn't really acknowledge her talent) but it just goes to show that what other people don't see in you, are acknowledged by other people. Sure, Sam Concepcion won the title of LBS, but did he ever get to meet Ellen? NUH UH!

Hahaha, okay. I'm starting to drain my brain again.

Ciao!

*sigh* (The bad kind)

I'm irrititated. REALLY irritated. So right now I'm trying to find my Zen place and loving state of being. *Breathe in, breathe out* Let's just say I'm glad the quarter is finally over. But seriously, why did I feel it was going to happen beforehand? Thank goodness I did or I would've been more pissed than I already am. It happened, it's over. I can't do anything about now. Shithead.

Now I'm just gathering stuff for my university applications and trying to relax as much as possible. Work again tomorrow and the days to come.

Waiting for my grades as well. 1 week. We'll see what my GPA is this time.

I think I'm gonna go back to bed.

zZzZzZzzzzz.....

Stressed and Overwhelmed are I.

I hate being stressed. These bags of emotions are just piling up and I'm not liking one bit of it. My mom left yesterday so that added to the stress. I'm kind of still getting used to the idea of her not being here. I mean, I've been apart from her for 8 months once... but now I'm just getting used to her not being here again. Another Christmas without my family :( Christmas is just gonna be another day. Oh well.

I'm also stressed because university application deadlines are nearing! Well one of the universities I'm applying to, anyway. It's January 15 and the other one is April 1. I've already started my personal statement essay, I just have to edit it here and there. I just have to complete the actual application as well, take a standardized test and gather other requirements. It's so overwhelming.

Speaking of being overwhelmed. As crazy as it may sound, I feel like I have the next 9 months of my life planned out! It was and still is necessary for me to think ahead because things are just happening too fast.

January- ISOP, university application due.
February- TOEFL (or in March)
March- Mom might come back.
April- University application due.
May- Renew passport.
June- Graduation.
July- Trip to L.A.
August- Visit Philippines
Renew my student visa
September- Start university!!!

Do you see what I mean?!! But it's good, at least I'm being organized and "in the know".

This month is just as bad... Just finished with my SpCmu final last Tuesday and I also managed to finish and turn in my Music perspective paper. What's left to do for this quarter is Statistics final on Monday and perspective paper for SpCmu due on Tuesday! Then there goes my MLT at UW next week. AND THEN I have to start working for ISOP. PHEW!!

It was good and helpful to vent. Thanks for reading. I'm out.