Naïveté

Today seemed like a long day: Attended my classes, went to the bank, stopped by at Safeway to buy a giftcard and now I am here; after two hours of reading ancient emails.

Shit. I was such a naive person back then. I was re-reading my emails to my girlfriends back in Cyprus when I first "fell in love" with this guy. Man oh man, I was such a stupid kid. I fell in the hole so fast that it was hard for me to get out of it. Coz of that, I built walls around me that are quite difficult for people to climb up at.

I need some shelter of my own protection baby

I've become the mean, tempermental bitch. The snob. The hard-to-get. And sometimes I hate myself for becoming those things. Why can't I be "normal"?

Whatever normal means.

I've pushed quite a few people away.

And there's this guy who's suprisingly still around. And I hope he continues to stick around a bit more until I figure out what to do with myself.

It's personal, myself and I
We've got some straightening out to do

I miss the times when I didn't have to think so much about things, when I didn't give a fuck.
I miss the risk-taker in me.